I took a break from twitter this week. And it was glorious.
I still checked my DMs and notifications (I mean come on. I talk to my ALA squad on there). But after things that happened earlier in the week? I needed an effing break.
Remember this post where I said we need to respect authors and let them write what they write and not bash them for being what they are?
That didn't go over so well.
I tried (and failed) to defend an author I love for not writing things she wasn't comfortable with. For writing the story she wanted to tell. Another, similar post popped up on someone else's blog. And the bashing. Oh the bashing.
I cannot tell you how many times I felt like I was being called a racist simply because I said we need proper representation of marginalized groups rather than anyone writing it willy nilly and making it shit. And the times people outright said it to me, saying I was going against the black community or the lgbt community. Ummm, hello?
The solution to this is obvious to me. You want more diversity? You write it. You want to see something written? Go write it and share it with the world. These days, with online self publishing and sites like wattpad, it's so easy to share your work with the world. There is really no excuse.
It's not up to everyone else to write for every single person in existence. Yes, we all want more diversity. And we should all strive to do better. But the fact of the matter is that sometimes we don't know enough, even with research.
With all the shit that went down, my anxiety levels spiked to higher than they've been in years. My depression returned, and thoughts of self harm were definitely there. I needed a fucking break. And it has been amazing.
Yes, I have occasionally checked my feed. Because it's so automatic, I can't really stop myself. But for the most part I'm staying away. I talk to my friends in DMs and respond if I have any new @'s. But that's it. I feel cleansed. My anxiety is still up there, but the depression has receded. And you know what? Aside from #PitMad this week, I think I'm going to be making this break indefinite. My mental health needs it.